A captive mind is a dangerous weapon, especially when we don't realize it. One way to get out of this captivity, I have found, is to question your inner demons and angels. Ask yourself questions that really get at the core of why you feel a certain way. Don't make the mistake of thinking you don't judge, or that you do not hold prejudice and stereotype. That flawed thinking is precisely what sometimes leads to us having more of these preconceived notions. I find myself thinking and questioning my actions more and more as I see new injustice unfold in the world.
Right now I just want to share a story.
During 9/11 I was in my second hour music class. We all were just being lazy students and our eccentric music teacher was in her own disheveled world. At this precise moment we noticed a birdlike object approaching the twin tours. I promise that looking back now there is nothing I regret more, however we were kids and we were in the thought that bad things just do not happen to us. We laughed and called this "bird" an idiot for flying soo low. Then we see smoke come out of the tours and even then we didn't react as we should. It was not until TV's were brought into our classroom and students were coming into my class to see if they could see the tours still, many of their parents were working in the area. I still remember being mad at the fact that my parents didn't pick me up from school. The depth of what had happened never hit until a few months later.
My dad worked in Manhattan at a quaint restaurant and all of a sudden his name tag was not well received anymore. My mom and I would wait near the subway to make sure he would be safe coming home. I have to say that I developed a love/hate relationship with New York at this time. However, can I blame anyone for hw they were feeling at that moment? No, I can't. They were captive in their minds because of all that was happening around them, unless they could be introspective they would probably not even realize what they were doing. We later moved to Michigan.
This past weekend I visited the Ground Zero with my brother in law and father. My brother in law is a pious, religious man, with a full beard and a very obvious look that just screams "Muslim Man". He worked in the Millenium Hilton at that time, so he has a certain attachment for that area. It was about 1:30 am when we decided to go, and I was scared. I was scared the police would stop us and suspect my dad and brother in law, even my mother. I was scared someone would scream some insult and I would lose it.
This feeling of fear in my head was more uncomfortable then the fear itself. Why was I scared? Because I am human. It's because I cannot simply think that someone would not look at us and say what are "they" doing "here" at this hour. Am I condoning this behavior? Absolutely not. However, just try and place yourself in other peoples' mind and thought (and not just their shoes) and then it's easy to love humanity a bit more. It becomes easier to tolerate people when you understand why they may feel this way, what is catalyzing their emotions and what can we do to try and alleviate that type of emotion.
We should not think of ourselves soo highly that we think we are non-judgmental, non-stereotype forming people. The challenge is in challenging your own judgments and stereotypes and understanding when it feels legitimate to feel that way and when the bounds of society have created that notion for us.
Next time I visit the Ground Zero, no matter what time and with who I go with, I will be a little less scared. I will know that even if I get stares and any unfortunate name-calling I can walk away with my head up high. I was affected too and my heart aches for all those lost, then and now.
Right now I just want to share a story.
During 9/11 I was in my second hour music class. We all were just being lazy students and our eccentric music teacher was in her own disheveled world. At this precise moment we noticed a birdlike object approaching the twin tours. I promise that looking back now there is nothing I regret more, however we were kids and we were in the thought that bad things just do not happen to us. We laughed and called this "bird" an idiot for flying soo low. Then we see smoke come out of the tours and even then we didn't react as we should. It was not until TV's were brought into our classroom and students were coming into my class to see if they could see the tours still, many of their parents were working in the area. I still remember being mad at the fact that my parents didn't pick me up from school. The depth of what had happened never hit until a few months later.
My dad worked in Manhattan at a quaint restaurant and all of a sudden his name tag was not well received anymore. My mom and I would wait near the subway to make sure he would be safe coming home. I have to say that I developed a love/hate relationship with New York at this time. However, can I blame anyone for hw they were feeling at that moment? No, I can't. They were captive in their minds because of all that was happening around them, unless they could be introspective they would probably not even realize what they were doing. We later moved to Michigan.
This past weekend I visited the Ground Zero with my brother in law and father. My brother in law is a pious, religious man, with a full beard and a very obvious look that just screams "Muslim Man". He worked in the Millenium Hilton at that time, so he has a certain attachment for that area. It was about 1:30 am when we decided to go, and I was scared. I was scared the police would stop us and suspect my dad and brother in law, even my mother. I was scared someone would scream some insult and I would lose it.
This feeling of fear in my head was more uncomfortable then the fear itself. Why was I scared? Because I am human. It's because I cannot simply think that someone would not look at us and say what are "they" doing "here" at this hour. Am I condoning this behavior? Absolutely not. However, just try and place yourself in other peoples' mind and thought (and not just their shoes) and then it's easy to love humanity a bit more. It becomes easier to tolerate people when you understand why they may feel this way, what is catalyzing their emotions and what can we do to try and alleviate that type of emotion.
We should not think of ourselves soo highly that we think we are non-judgmental, non-stereotype forming people. The challenge is in challenging your own judgments and stereotypes and understanding when it feels legitimate to feel that way and when the bounds of society have created that notion for us.
Next time I visit the Ground Zero, no matter what time and with who I go with, I will be a little less scared. I will know that even if I get stares and any unfortunate name-calling I can walk away with my head up high. I was affected too and my heart aches for all those lost, then and now.
Thanks for sharing this. I had no idea you lived in NYC at the time. It was such a tragedy for everyone, but it is sad about the heightened stereotypes it created. I'm optimistic that things are getting better!
ReplyDelete